the last days of disco

For whatever reason this phrase keeps coming into my mind. The last days of disco. The last hot summer with a teeny baby. Long, stinky afternoons beneath the mountain ash, nursings in the shade. This little groove we've been rockin' is about to shift. Turn into weird early 80's electronic musings. A kiddo in school all day. A mama back at her paying job. A little man who gets to hang with the hottest nanny this side of the ol' Miss. Cuz daycare just wasn't meant to be. Not for someone so little. No when the lady bails two days before school starts. You get what you pay for. And sometimes the universe tells you to up the ante.



Part of our last hurrah involved a visit from my sister Wendy and E and S's eight year old cousin, Piper. They couldn't have come at a better time. Mid August was smoke free with perfect sunshine and the slightest of breezes. We explored in and around town. Thankfully, Piper loves the carousel as much as Eliana, so they were able to enjoy our little small town luxury to the hilt.


One of the best things about having family visit is it makes me feel like they actually see the life I've chosen. I've come so far from where I grew up. I never could have predicted this path we've found. Yet I adore my life, my town, my adopted state, my peeps here. Wendy and I were able to enjoy each other so fully in our few days together. That makes four of E and S's aunties here this summer. Four cousins. Three grandparents. Loads of friends. So many people who love us.


And it's not glamorous. It's not fancy. It's just us. It's real. It's beautiful. It's raw and loud and messy. Even today as I anticipated our buddies arrival from San Francisco - buddies without children - I tried, however valiantly, to de-kidify our home. I put the bottle in the fridge. Consolidated toys. Picked up ABC magnets. Put half eaten plastic plates of food down the drain instead of hoping they'd be finished later. And, really, I have no idea why. Our friends are curious about what really happens when real people have real children. I can show them what happens when people have children. And I'm quite certain they would say it all looks pretty cool. They'll be there soon enough.

It's just this glorious life.

Yet I still feel the ridiculous urge to tidy it all up. Make it look seamless. As if. As if we could even pretend that it wasn't enormous.

So here we are. The end of August. The last days of disco. Two children and their tremendous personalities. Possibilities. Our world overflowing with love. With the stuff that makes you see your life as a circle. A circle that glows and pulses. A circle that screams and cries happy tears. Helps you make connections. Remember how similar you really are to your roots. Sisters. So much love! These are your people! And then you make your own people. And the puzzle re-works itself. And it's so damn cool.