so sleepy

I am so sleepy. I turned 35 and I got sleepy. All the time.

I am the kind of person who has never been able to nap. I think it's a cool thing for other folks to do. It's just never been my thing. Ever. It's not in my vocabulary.

But for the past week or so, when I stop, the only thing I can imagine doing is going to sleep. Or at least getting horizontal in some way. Last night I went to sleep at 9:30. It was a Friday night. My sister and brother-in-law are visiting from Portland. They stayed up and drank beer and laughed loud. What in the world is the matter with me? I don't want to age like this.

And then I think of my average week day. And it's pretty damn busy. I had a mama and published writer lead some guest poetry workshops in my class last week. At the end of the second day she said something like, "I have no idea how you do this every single day." Her comment certainly resonated with me. Going home to a wild little toddler and then teaching dance/yoga a few nights a week certainly doesn't make it any easier. So perhaps I'm earning my exhaustion. But I don't like it. I feel lazy when I'm this sleepy. I put Eliana down for her nap early just so I could get in bed. In my guilty haste, I decided to write about it instead.

Maybe your body really, truly slows down the minute you turn 35. Maybe it's just that time of year when teachers are in desperate need of spring vacation. Maybe that's why we only work nine months out of the year and take lots of breaks. Whatever it is, I'm plum tuckered out.

So I am going to go pretend to read my book, but most likely I'll join Eliana in her slumber. I kinda wish I had footed jammies, a night night and sleepy sack too.