Eliana has always been an exceptional communicator. But lately her ability to express herself just seems to be bursting forth. She has no trouble telling us what she wants or needs. For example, last night she woke up around midnight feeling pretty hungry. I tried to nurse her and she bit me. She wasn't interested. And it wasn't an angry, bratty bite, it was just a firm, "no" sort of bite. She then lay her head on my chest, sorta half awake and kinda whimpered. I asked her if she was hungry and she said, "chiz?" I asked Jeff to get her bag of beloved organic cheddar curds out of the fridge. She proceeded to eat, I swear, half of the bag, the whole time her little head just nestled on my chest like she's eating bon bons and snuggling into some fluffy pink pillow like some sort of fancy lady. She kept saying, "uummmm, ummm!" and then gently chewing. It was insanely sweet. I felt her independence in her choice to eat cheese over nurse, but I also felt her need to be close to me, to share her nurturing moment with me in some way.
It was one of those moments I just didn't want to forget. I couldn't get to sleep after that. I just wanted her to stay glued to my chest for the rest of the night, wished we were still co-sleeping, wished she liked to snuggle more than wriggle, wished that time could just stand still. With all that's happening in the world, all the changes, all that's at stake, that moment of cheese curds in bed was one of total solidity, total reassurance in the brilliance of the moment.
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